﻿{"id":6768,"date":"2020-03-16T13:37:03","date_gmt":"2020-03-16T12:37:03","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.laurent-bayart.fr\/?p=6768"},"modified":"2020-03-25T10:41:44","modified_gmt":"2020-03-25T09:41:44","slug":"billet-dhumeur-acte-89-apo-cul-ypse-now","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.laurent-bayart.fr\/?p=6768","title":{"rendered":"BILLET D\u2019HUMEUR \/ ACTE 89 \/ APO-CUL-YPSE NOW"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p><\/p>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-image\"><figure class=\"aligncenter size-large is-resized\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/www.laurent-bayart.fr\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/IMG_3068-1024x768.jpg\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-6770\" width=\"453\" height=\"339\" srcset=\"http:\/\/www.laurent-bayart.fr\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/IMG_3068-1024x768.jpg 1024w, http:\/\/www.laurent-bayart.fr\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/IMG_3068-300x225.jpg 300w, http:\/\/www.laurent-bayart.fr\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/IMG_3068-768x576.jpg 768w, http:\/\/www.laurent-bayart.fr\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/IMG_3068-1536x1152.jpg 1536w, http:\/\/www.laurent-bayart.fr\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/03\/IMG_3068-2048x1536.jpg 2048w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 453px) 100vw, 453px\" \/><\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n<p>           A force de pr\u00e9voir des sc\u00e9narios catastrophe, \u00e0 grands coups de bombes atomiques et autres docteurs Folamour, nos grands pr\u00e9visionnistes de l\u2019apocalypse n\u2019ont pas vu venir l\u2019infinit\u00e9simal du monde microbien des virus, une autre mani\u00e8re de guerre (des scientifiques apprentis sorciers&nbsp;?) et qui se r\u00e9pand \u00e0 la vitesse d\u2019une train\u00e9e de poudre. Il aura suffi ce grand tohu-bohu sanitaire venu de Chine pour faire basculer le monde dans un surprenant chaos, une onde de choc \u00e0 faire tousser toute la plan\u00e8te et \u00e0 affoler les thermom\u00e8tres du monde entier. Et voil\u00e0, que tout s\u2019enraye, se d\u00e9r\u00e8gle, les bourses s\u2019effondrent, les h\u00f4pitaux se remplissent, les poign\u00e9es de mains se figent, les visages se masquent, les sourires se crispent\u2026Et voici que les caddies de supermarch\u00e9s deviennent ob\u00e8ses et boulimiques. Ils se remplissent comme dans un film de guerre. Et il para\u00eet que le papier toilette, autrement dit le pq, conna\u00eet un succ\u00e8s incroyable qui fr\u00f4le l\u2019hyst\u00e9rie, la diarrh\u00e9e de la b\u00eatise en quelque sorte&nbsp;!&nbsp;<em>L\u2019apo-cul-ypse now&nbsp;<\/em>serait-on&nbsp;&nbsp;tent\u00e9 de pasticher. On n\u2019en sourirait presque si cela n\u2019\u00e9tait pas tout simplement path\u00e9tique\u2026incroyable \u00e2nerie humaine.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>&nbsp;Finalement, l\u2019homme est probablement le plus grand\u2026virus de la plan\u00e8te. Le p\u00e8re Ubu n\u2019est pas mort. Mieux, en ces temps de pand\u00e9mie, c\u2019est le seul \u00e0 se porter comme un charme&nbsp;!<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0\u00a0                           copyright Laurent BAYART<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;                                         16 mars 2020<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>A force de pr\u00e9voir des sc\u00e9narios catastrophe, \u00e0 grands coups de bombes atomiques et autres docteurs Folamour, nos grands pr\u00e9visionnistes de l\u2019apocalypse n\u2019ont pas vu venir l\u2019infinit\u00e9simal du monde microbien des virus, une autre mani\u00e8re de guerre (des scientifiques apprentis sorciers&nbsp;?) et qui se r\u00e9pand \u00e0 la vitesse d\u2019une train\u00e9e de poudre. Il aura suffi &hellip; <a href=\"http:\/\/www.laurent-bayart.fr\/?p=6768\" class=\"more-link\">Continuer la lecture de <span class=\"screen-reader-text\">BILLET D\u2019HUMEUR \/ ACTE 89 \/ APO-CUL-YPSE NOW<\/span>  <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[6],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-6768","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-blog-notes"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p4doc5-1La","jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.laurent-bayart.fr\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6768","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.laurent-bayart.fr\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.laurent-bayart.fr\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.laurent-bayart.fr\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.laurent-bayart.fr\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=6768"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"http:\/\/www.laurent-bayart.fr\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6768\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":6814,"href":"http:\/\/www.laurent-bayart.fr\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6768\/revisions\/6814"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.laurent-bayart.fr\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=6768"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.laurent-bayart.fr\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=6768"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.laurent-bayart.fr\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=6768"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}